Let My Spouse Know She Matters - Three Areas You Can Help You Build a Stronger Marriage

Are you in a marriage that is spiraling out of control and you are asking your self “how do I let my spouse know she matters?” Getting through to your spouse can be difficult but I have always found in my counseling sessions that problems in a marriage boil down to three areas. Those areas are communication, trust and learning to appreciate each other. These are the 3 main qualities that strong marriages are built on.

Building a dynamic marriage with your spouse is not something that happens overnight. You have to remember that you are different people all together. There are going to be times where you do not agree with each other. It is only natural. But you both can work with each other to develop the communication skills that you both need to talk out your issues. Building trust in each other will allow you both see that you are each others best friend and that you are committed to the relationship. Learning to appreciate each other will show that you care dearly for each other.

Build Communication

Poor communication between couples will lead to misunderstandings in the dynamics of the marriage. Couples who talk regularly are three times more likely to be able to avoid divorce or separation when a marriage has come to a critical bump. This is because couples who have developed communication in the marriage know how to work out the small problems before they turn into bigger problems that can bring the marriage to a disastrous point. So I would make this my first step in any relationship building exercise. Simple make time for each other everyday to talk for 30 minutes. Talk about what ever you like. The important thing is to share your thoughts and feelings with each other.

Build Trust

Building trust is a little more difficult when being compared to communication. Trust is either there or it is not. So if you trust your spouse, I would hope that they are giving you the same trust in return. If not, then this should be a topic discussed in the communication section. And in turn if you do not trust your spouse then you have some soul searching to do to see if you can ever trust your spouse, for what ever reason. Ask yourself the following questions to help give you some perspective on your thoughts and you can use them when you revert to the communication step to work out your trust issues.

What has transpired that has broken the trust in the relationship?

How do you both feel about what has transpired?

Can you both see yourselves committed to building the trust again in the marriage?

How would you both like to go about rebuilding the trust in the marriage?

Learn to appreciate each other

My wife once told me that she loves me for the little things that I do. And in my marriage counseling sessions, I have found that many spouses are looking for that small sign of appreciation from their loved one. We all need to be reminded that we are loved. So show your appreciation by doing small favors for your spouse. Flowers for no special reason, doing the dishes because you want to help are a few quick one that are coming off the top of my head. You know what your spouse would appreciate. So let them know every now and then that you care.

Conclusion

I hope that I have been able to help you identify “how do I let my spouse know she matters?” Showing your wife that you are devoted in the marriage will go a long way to developing a strong happy marriage that will last the trials of time.