Relationship Help - The Secret to a Loving, Intimate Relationship

I ran across this article tonight while doing a little research and just left that I needed to publish it on the blog for my readers. This article deals with the importance of remembering that it does take two people to have a loving and successful relationship. Being the selfish party is only going to chip away what ever is keeping you both together, So start thinking about your spouse or significant other for a change.

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Relationship Help - The Secret to a Loving, Intimate Relationship
By Jo Baker

I was reading in a book the other day, and it said that the majority of relationships fail due to selfishness. Thinking on that for a moment, I realized that the root of all marriage difficulties could be traced back to that one human flaw - thinking of oneself only.

When I was younger, my desire was to be close to my soul-mate, so how did I go about building a loving intimate relationship? Where could I go and what to do to get the relationship help I needed...

Do not get me wrong, you do need to think of yourself in that you have enough resources within you to give to yourself and others, but, you also need to think of others in that same way. As much time and consideration as you give yourself, you also need to give to those around you.

Back to when I was young - in my late teens in fact. I fell head over heels with THE most gorgeous guy... well, we were soul-mates from the get-go! The world was our oyster, time stood still and we had a life of endless possibilities ahead of us. We thought we knew it all and that we had everything... we did not have lots of things, but we had a love that transcended all of that.

There was, however, one fly in the ointment...

My love was as young as I was, and he liked to keep things private... he had left a large family and he could now choose what he shared and with whom, and he relished being able to keep things, thoughts, feelings private.

I also had come from a large family, and my comfort was in sharing things with others. I was very uncomfortable about being on my own, and not knowing what was going on with my mate. All the insecurities of the young was laid on our shoulders, and we could not share our thoughts and feelings with each other - verbally. No problems with the physical communication, but you can not build a relationship on that alone.

Selfishness was at the root of our unenviable situation, and imaginations were let loose.

We could not talk with each other about the things that really mattered to the two of us and as a result we eventually went our separate ways through a crippling amount of pain and heartache. There is a surprise ending to this story... we met again after about 25 years of going our separate ways... still in love, not ever having stopped loving each other, or maybe, loving the idea of being in love with each other.

After living our lives in other relationships that also did not work out, we finally got back together... older, wiser, more prepared to work on our relationship, both realizing commitment, communication and a selflessness toward each other were what would make this new stage of our relationship work.
And it has.

Thirty and a half years after we first met, we were finally married, and now we live comfortably with ourselves and each other, learning each day to build our loving intimate relationship based on caring as much about the other as we do about ourselves.

We share more - verbally, time, and space, and it is good.
Learning how to give into a relationship takes time, effort and know-how. If you are struggling with making your relationship work and need relationship help, or, instead, you have found yourself 'out in the cold' because your love has just left you, you can get help to get back together or put that spark back into your love and grow it again.

All is not lost! You can build the loving intimate relationship you have always dreamed of. While it will take some time, won't it be worth it?

Learn more about the specific timings you need to know about to get back with your ex, or how to make your relationship work better than you ever dreamed possible here - http://myrelationshiphelp.info.... there is nothing like starting right now to get your loving intimate relationship back!

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Jo_Baker

Three Tips That Can Help You Save Your Marriage and Stop Your Divorce

It is a known fact that couples in a marriage will face a marriage ending problem sometime during the marriage. All couples get into an argument here and there. We are all human after all and we all make mistakes. The great thing about mistakes and problems is that they can be fixed. There is no reason to allow a divorce to progress when you can save your marriage and avoid a divorce.

Here are a few tips that can help you begin to save your marriage.

1. Control your emotions. Allowing yourself to become emotional and loss control of yourself will hurt this process more than you will ever know. A child throwing a temper tantrum should never get its way, why should you if you are acting like a child? Be mature about the healing process, even when your spouse is not.

2. Show your spouse that you want to listen to their concerns. This is a time when your spouse is looking for something solid and dependable. This is an opportunity to show them that you can be that person. Your goal is not to smother you spouse, but remind them that you are there for them.

3. Understand that you are both victims in this bad situation. You both are in a state of pain while the divorce is allowed to progress. Even victims need some help. Work with your spouse to help them understand that, and try to get both of you in a support group or couples counseling.

The road to saving your marriage is a long and sometime painful road. But the rewards that await you will be beneficial to both of you if you are committed to your spouse and marriage.

Ways That You Can Fix Your Relationship With The Wife?

It is normal for a couple to hit a rough patch in a marriage. And it seems that the man is always the one that needs the most help with reconciling with his wife. Here are the keys that I focus on in my sessions.

Analyze Your Marriage
You should ask yourself the following questions.

- What went wrong in the marriage?
- Was she giving off signs that she was unhappy?
- What can I do to show her that I love her?
- What can I change about me to show her that I can change?


These are all very good questions that you can address to see what direction you need to take to resolve any marital issues that you both have.


Talk to her
It is amazing how powerful communicating with your wife can be. Most of the time marriages fail because there wasn't enough talking taking place and couples just fall out of touch with each other. This is a good time to open up the communication channels and show her that you are not afraid to sit down with her and talk seriously about your marriage.

Take her out on dates
The dating does not stop just because you are married. You both need your time alone away from the house and the kids to explore each other. And there is no better way to do this than going out on dates. If the kids are big enough get out for the weekend. This is a great way to get the passion back in your marriage.

Conclusion
Couples need to understand that repairing a troubled marriage takes a lot of hard work from both parties. And this extra work is going to pay off in the long run with you and your wife having a stronger marriage that is filled with love and compassion for each other.